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Parents/Carers

Supporting your teen’s mental health: Guidance for parents and carers

The teenage years can be a turbulent time and it’s natural for young people to experience mood swings or changes in behaviour. But sometimes these changes can be signs of anxiety, low mood or mental health struggles. As a parent or carer, your instincts and relationship with your child mean you’re often the first to notice when something isn’t right.

Spotting the signs – When to look a little closer

Look out for patterns of behaviour or changes that seem unusual for your child and last more than a couple of weeks.

Emotional changes

  • Consistently sad, anxious, irritable, or unusually angry
  • Tearful for “no reason”, or increasingly sensitive to criticism
  • Expressing hopelessness, guilt, or low self-esteem

Behavioural signs

  • Withdrawing from family life or avoiding friends
  • Loss of interest in hobbies, activities, social events
  • Changes in sleep — struggling to fall asleep, waking at night or sleeping too much
  • Drop in motivation or school performance

Physical symptoms

  • Constant tiredness or fatigue
  • Changes in appetite or weight
  • Frequent illnesses with no apparent cause (e.g. headaches, stomach aches)

Concerning behaviours

  • Use of self-harm to cope (e.g. cuts, burns, scratching) — often accompanied by wearing long sleeves in hot weather
  • Talking about feeling overwhelmed, worthless, or not wanting to be here
  • Increased risk-taking behaviour, including alcohol or substance use

Starting the conversation

Opening up a conversation about mental health might feel uncomfortable — especially if your teen is withdrawn or defensive. Try these steps to gently encourage them to talk.

1. Pick a casual, relaxed moment

Choose somewhere calm and private - during a car journey, walk, or while doing an activity together, rather than making it feel like a formal ‘sit-down’.

2. Notice, don’t confront

Start with what you’ve observed: “I’ve noticed you’ve seemed more down recently and I just wanted to see how you’re feeling.”

3. Create space to talk

Let them speak in their own time. Show you’re listening through eye contact, nodding, and open-ended questions like “What’s been on your mind lately?” Avoid interrupting or jumping in with solutions.

4. Stay calm and open-minded

Try not to react with shock, panic, or judgement. Instead, reassure them that they’re not in trouble and you’re there to support them:

“Whatever you’re going through, we’ll get through it together.”

5. Offer reassurance and practical support

  • Acknowledge their feelings: “That sounds really hard.”
  • Remind them they are loved and not alone.
  • Ask what would help — more time to talk, professional help, changes at home or school?

6. Know when to seek extra help

If your child is struggling to cope, or you’re worried about their safety, seek support from:

  • Your GP
  • School mental health or pastoral team (insert contact details/link)
  • Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) (insert contact details/link)
  • Helplines like YoungMinds Parents' Helpline 0808 802 5544 or Samaritans 116 123 are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

You’re not expected to have all the answers

The most important thing is that your child knows you care and you’re there for them without judgement. Starting that conversation could be the turning point that enables them to access the help and support they need.

If you feel you may benefit from some training, please speak to your child’s school’s mental health lead or take a look at the courses with StayWell.

There is also free training available for suicide awareness and prevention available here. 

Helpful apps

Here are some great free apps designed to help support mental health. They’ve got simple tools to help you manage stress, handle tough emotions, and learn more about what’s going on in your mind.

Other helpful links

 

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